being myself

So I went on a date last night.  

I hate dating.  Pretty much despise it. 

But, I decided to take a new approach last night.  I didn't wear eyeliner - mainly because I couldn't find it in my makeup case.  (Lord, knows where that damn thing went - and I had two of them at one point!)  I didn't workout like crazy for days before and starve myself in hopes of feeling skinny.  I even ate a full dinner along with chocolate before I met this guy for a drink.  I didn't stress out about showing up on time - instead, I was late like my usual self always is.  I didn't curse like a sailor, but I also didn't watch every word and every phrase that came out of my mouth.  I told embarrassing, self-deprecating stories about myself.  I acted a little dumb and talked a little bit like a valley girl - because that's what I do sometimes.  And he ate it up... all of it.  So that's my new plan from now on for dates - no more tons of eyeliner, 4-inch heels, and outfits that are tight, uncomfortable, and make me feel like I need to sit a certain way or else things will show that I don't want to show.  

I'm not perfect and I don't expect others to be perfect.  In fact, it makes me uncomfortable. Because instead they just end up looking and sounding fake.  I don't trust people that don't speak their mind (double negative, I know, but this is my blog, so I do what I want! ha.).  They freak me out.  2011 game plan = be myself. always, whether anyone likes it or not.  I don't have enough time or energy to waste trying to be something else for someone. Perhaps, this was the mistake I've been making all along...